More focused on internal thoughts, feelings and moods rather than external stimulation, the Reserved attribute appeals to those people who tend to be more introspective and like to be quiet. Very private people, they rarely speak about themselves or their feelings. Being inconspicuous and melting into the background facilitates their need to feel safe. Standing out from the crowd, for whatever reason, would make them feel very vulnerable.

There are no significant differences between the number of women and men who espouse this attribute, but there are indications that those at school leaving age or in in the mid-life phase are slightly more likely to Reserved espousers. Our working hypothesis would be that such ages align with times when a person’s sense of self and social role are most fluid (moving into adulthood or moving into middle/old age).

Unlike gregarious individuals, who feel more energised after social interaction, Reserved espousers tend to feel more drained after being sociable and often feel the need to recharge by spending some time alone. So, they do not make an effort to get out and meet new people, preferring to keep themselves to themselves. This does not mean that all Reserved espousers are unsociable or anti-social (although some are!) - they just prefer to choose when to come out of their shells, which is more likely when they feel safe and secure. They are slow to reveal their emotions or opinions, so will need encouragement to do so. When they are given enough time to get to know people they can have some great conversations, which might be quite surprising to a lot of their acquaintances.

Reserved espousers like to see themselves as respectable pillars of society who always conform and do the right thing. Their problem is that they may not always know how to get the gold stars for good behaviour, due to the range and diversity of people that live in their neighbourhood, who may have a wide range of beliefs, values and priorities. To illustrate, choosing the right clothes to buy and wear is a source of stress - possibly distress - because it is hard to find the clothes that match with their sense of identity, yet do not stray too far from the socially acceptable norms. They dress for comfort, or to convey a sense of respectability when they venture out into the world - they find it near impossible to do both.

At core, Reserved espousers love to feel safe and secure, so they rarely take risks, preferring to live in areas that have low crime rates and treating their home like a castle. For them, it is also about maintaining control, particularly over their own feelings and thoughts. Consequently, they avoid exciting activities or behaviours that trigger the release of too much adrenaline into their bloodstreams. This ensures that they stay centred and reduces the risk of their embarrassing themselves in front of their neighbours. A calm, predictable life is what they like and feel motivated to maintain.